A Robbery

“Demonstration?” I say.

“No time for an explanation now. Be calm.”

I am trying, though it sounds dangerous. I say, “OK.”

I am whispering now, as you can see, into my computer that she is sending me a thought. She sends me a thought, “Uaydix?”

I think, “I don’t know if I should.”

She says out loud, “I just want you to observe his thoughts and my thoughts and participate in what I do. OK?”


She thinks to me, “Uaydix?”

I think back, “Yes.”

She thinks, “No time left. He’s here.” A really tall man with a ruddy complexion, looking innocent and benevolent like a politician, points a gun at us. He says, “Give me all your money.”

Efilioe says, “The money is behind the black panel. You can see it.”

He says, “I don’t see it — I just see my reflection. You’re stalling. Tell me how to open it or I’ll kill you and your boyfriend too. Anyway, I don’t believe it. There’s nothing there. Where’s your stash?”

“Look,” says Efilioe, “you can see there’s $10,000 behind the panel.”

“I just see my reflection and … how did you get a picture of my wife?”

“Huh?” says Efilioe feigning innocence.

“See Doug,” Efilioe thinks to me, “how stress and guilt can explode into consciousness from the ugly depths.”

“Efilioe,” I think, “does he know what’s going on?”

“No,” she thinks, “he’s fallen into a pit of anxiety.”

He says, “And now I see the casino where I lost all my money. How… did you do that?”

“Relax, don’t worry Richard,” says Efilioe.

“Do I know you?” says Richard.

“No Richard, but look at the back of the casino where there’s a door…”

“Yeah, so what,” he says.

“Just see if you can get there, just out of curiosity… You do wonder. No? Maybe the secret to wealth or enough money to get your wife the present you promised.”

“Doug,” she thinks, “do you see what he sees?”

“Yes,” I think to her.

“Richard,” Efilioe says, “open the door and realize how you can count the steps. They are numbered backwards. Step on the platform of the red step. It is number 7. See it?”

“Yes,” he says, “so is that lucky or something?”

“If you step on it,” she is saying, “you’ll feel much better. Just try it out of curiosity.”

Richard says, “Yeah, I stepped on it and it feels like a shot of vodka.”

“Indeed,” says Efilioe, “good to be high, feel like you’re going deeper and deeper, more relaxed, down into calm, down to gentle sleep…”

“Where now?” asks Richard.

“Orange step 6,” says Efilioe, “and like another shot of vodka you go deeper…”

“Doug,” she is thinking to me, “can you pick up on his feelings?”

“Yes,” I think.

Efilioe continues, “Deeper, deeper…”

“Doug,” she thinks, “do you feel the cadence and beat of this?”

“Yes,” I think

Efilioe says, “Down, down, down, … more relaxed, more calm, and you’re eager to climb down the steps to the yellow step 5. ”

“Yes, yellow,” says Richard.

Efilioe says, “Do it…feel it, step 5. And now green, step 4, down… down… down, deep-er, DEEPER, DEEP-er.”

“Uh huh,” he says.

“Step 3 blue. Down… down… down, and DEEPer…DEEPer…DEEPer…”

“Smooth drink” he says out of nowhere.”

“Step two. Down and down and down. Step one, the violet and you love me like the flower whose scent does draw your ardor of devotion. Put down your steel gun dear.”

Efilioe thinks to me, “Doug are you paying attention? Remember BRMEGR.”

“I feel too sleepy to pay attention,” I feel myself saying.

“Now,” she says, “we’re going to have a picnic. Let’s all lie down on the beach blanket face down for a nap.”

The three of us are walking to the blanket and lying down. Seems like we could sleep perhaps.

Although Efilioe is getting up. “Richard,” she says, “I’ll give you a back massage. Put your hands on your buttocks, and arch your back. Now, let your little fingers touch…”

“Yes, uh huh,” says Richard.

“Now, turn your palms together and lift your hands up a little if you must.”


“Now that you are fixed in this position, you cannot move. The harder you try the more difficult it will be. See if you can move your hands apart.”

“I can’t,” Richard says.

Efilioe is going back to the cart to get something. She returns. “I’m now putting on your handcuffs. Do you feel how they are tightening around your wrists?”

“Yes,” says Richard, “what are you going to do?”

“Well,” says Efilioe, “I haven’t decided yet. But it’s such a nice sunny day. OK, now let’s all take a nap, and I’ll give you both a back massage later.”

I am feeling so sleepy and I’m going to take a nap.


I am waking up with an itch on my nose, but I can’t reach it because my hands are stuck behind my back. I am wearing handcuffs. “Efilioe,” I am shouting, “what did you do?”

She is casually strolling over from some distance. She says, “I told you to BRMEGR or there could be dire consequences.”

“You never explained that,” I’m saying but she is not listening. She apparently is going back to the cart to retrieve something from a storage compartment. She comes back with a long knife, and a long rope.

Richard yells out, “You’re not going to kill us are you?”

“Well,” she says, “Maybe I won’t if you cooperate.” She touches his neck with the tip of the knife.

“OK,” She says, “I have to get organized here… Let’s try this lesson again: Doug, as you close your eyes, you see yourself going down the rainbow stairs again and when you reach violet the perfume lets you know you love me and will do anything I say with the ardor of devotion. And now, you will find that your legs are coming together…”

I am feeling sleepy and I am feeling her putting the rope around my ankles tying them together. She touches my neck with the tip of the knife. “You are an inconvenience right now, but you feel your legs bending.”

My legs are bending and I am finding that my ankles are tied to my handcuffs. In trying to resist I feel more sleepy and I’m getting weaker.

“Yes, this is better, now I only have Richard to worry about at the moment until I can decide how many deaths there will be. This is now more manageable…”

She is putting the knife under Richard’s shirt. He gasps. She is pulling it up and tearing it. She puts it under his sleeves and rips them too. She tears off his shirt altogether. She unbuckles his belt, unbuttons his pants, pulls them off altogether along with his underpants. She dumps things out of his pockets. “Aha,” she says, “a cell phone… I will make it look like you’ve been having a long affair with me, and I didn’t know you were married. Shall I call your wife or the police?”

He says, “Just kill me. You could do it and if you kill him there’ll be no witnesses against you.”

“I could do that,” she says, “The two of you no one would miss, and probably Zusoiti would be pleased. Interesting suggestion — a sacrifice to the Gods. Hmm, I could stab you a few times in the back, or turn you over and stab you in the heart.”

He is screaming. She is scratching his back with the tip of the knife with long strokes. “I promised you a massage, didn’t I.”

He shouts, “Quickly, before you change your mind, before someone comes.”

“Very well then, put your ankles together and I will hog tie you so you don’t runaway like a chicken without a head.” She ties him up tight, stabs him in the shoulder, and rolls him into the forest next to a Black Locust tree. She comes back over the grass towards me. “Hmm, a quick death. I’ll have to think about it: one or two.” She puts down a radio on the blanket next to my computer equipment which she leaves on. “Here,” she says, “listen to the radio, and I’ll leave your equipment on auto-blog mode. You can’t talk too loud now however. Maybe you can leave your last words… Yeah, hmm, now that I think about it, I think two deaths are best. I’ll be back in an hour. Too bad you ignored BRMEGR. It’s not much time, but see what you can do in an hour. Everybody has to die sometime you know, but at least you know exactly when.” And now she is covering me completely with another blanket.


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