Based on photo by @bethanylynn1210
This is a major crisis. The historical record has been purged. All I see now is warning, warning, warnings. “Don’t use waxed paper in the oven, because it’ll smoke and catch fire. We will gladly sell you parchment paper that’s been soaked in silicon.” But they used to use wax paper in the oven all the way back to the Middle Ages. Didn’t they? It’s been erased from the record. For our safety they have confiscated Grandma’s and Great-Great Grandma’s recipe records. They’ve stolen even recipes from the Wild,Wild West.
I did manage to find a few brave rebels, but they are probably under arrest by now, and their website taken down. Maybe you can still find a cached version. I don’t know. It used to be here:
How To Bake Cookies With Wax Paper by Leaf.
Also apparently now missing from the historical record is the Sachertorte. Back in 1832, Franz Sacher baked this cake using wax paper. He was trying to ingratiate himself with the Viennese Prince Klemens Von Metternich. Now with all the references destroyed, he has died in vain.
Although there is a cookbook for kids that makes a cake with wax paper. I don’t know if it still exists and whether it’s safe according to the authorities. Cooking the Austrian Way, p. 54, Helga Hughes 2004, Juvenile Nonfiction, ISBN 0822541025
But this is just the tip of the Ice Berg. When the Ice Age comes many things will be censored, and the High Priestess will outlaw pizza and poetry by decree.
But here is an unfortunate Poem by Doug:
Slowly, petal by petal,
like bloomies of wax paper
I see them, and know that
I’ve strawflowers on flour day,
have many cookies to eat, and
have these new awesome flowers
with crinkly origami smiles, because
for this day, strawflowers
informal flora as they are with endless straws
chat with me by their signing bloom
as I dip these straws of mine
in to two
for my love.
[The words “wax paper” will be outlawed as well as “Wax Paper Valley”]